Becoming

I have never 

Met this version of myself before
Anyone else 
Would have been told to fuck directly off
Strong feminine energy
Reduced to ashes
With every step
I unraveled
A little more of me 

Revealed the further I went
Daddy's home
Wait
That's weird
But it's all my brain will excitedly say
My heart
It turns out
Is both the strongest 
And weakest thing about me
It's just that
I feel so peaceful
There are no butterflies
Because this is not triggering my anxiety
Just a burning desire to be 
Who I'm supposed to become
I'm so wildly hopeful
And I know I should know better
But I have yet to witness a sunset 
That I didn't want to watch in your eyes
Balanced 
Mature
I feel like I can do anything 
With you by my side
What you're failing to realize 
Is that our greatest failings
Hold the seeds of our biggest blessings
There's beauty 

In the process of becoming 
Have faith
It's okay to explode and rebuild

Until you reach the realization
You don't have to anymore
I keep reaching out for my sword 
And find that my shield is mere splinters
Where we drew the line in the sand
I still see the universe in your eyes

Do not ask me 
If I hold space 
In my love for you still
In any other language
I would simply say 
You don't exist to me
But if you ask me to explain in poetry
I would tell you
That I'd cut my own heart 
Out of my chest while it beats
So neither of us 
Could be disappointed 
By the fact that you never left it

Cynicallovebird