Walls, Who Needs Them?

I have been told that I have a glacier surrounding my heart.

Take a closer look

It's paper mache.

 

This is the guy I love.
Have loved for nearly half a year.
The one who, without expectation, 
shows up for me.
He takes me as I am without blinking.
I have spent 37 years building the strongest of walls.
I believed that finally, 
upon its gravity defying completion that no man, woman or beast 
would ever be able to penetrate my self inflicted prison.
Until one day, 
a snarky, self deprecating social media joke 
about there being no hope for my dating life
brought me to the attention of a couple of coworkers.
Then a man,
this man,
who saw past my creation.
I fell as he fought his way through
and he found me here;
unguarded and fine with my destruction.
As a matter of fact, 
I am at peace with the rubble at my feet.
I was so used to holding everything up 
that I had no idea how exhausting it really was.
It was a terrifying thought to realize that it's been ten years since my kids have met anyone I was dating.
5 minutes into sitting around at the dinner table and it was as if we'd been there every night for years.
He's the one of the top five things I think about when I wake up in the morning,
navigating the desire to get up is always first.
He's the one who keeps me in a straight line.
He treats me like a person worth getting to know.
He understands the value of people.
That means more than anything to me.
When we talk, he says things like "us" and "we" 
and I don't feel like a cat being baptized in a swimming pool full of alligators.
I have a brain and I love that he likes it when I use it;  
and when I don't.
Without him, I'd be an overdue library book without vowels.
A complete mess.
The one that captured the hearts of my dog and children 
before I even realized that he was already in mine.
And if I'm truly honest about it for a minute,
he was the second he ordered my favorite sandwich on our first date.
I like him more than I like pineapple on pizza,
and that's saying something.
Apparently gravity is here to stay and so is he.

~Cynicallovebird